Who am I Actually Talking To (and Who I am Not)
I am gonna do something that most people in business would tell you not to do, I am gonna tell you exactly who should not invest money with me.
Almost a month ago, I wrote about a retreat that I had envisioned for years, in retrospect I was vague even though I had an entire list of who this is for. I want to be even more honest than I have been about what Ive created.
What I have created is not for the woman who wants a spa day.
And let me be clear, I LOVE spa days, but this isnt that + I say that with zero judgment. Spa days are wonderful + can really breath life back into a person. But the reality is there’s a version of self care that is about getting away from your life for a few hours + there is a version that is about getting back into your body. Those are 2 totally different approaches + outcomes. If what you need right now is a massage + a quiet room, book that. I mean it. That is a real need that this day will not scratch.
This is not for the woman who wants to be entertained.
Although, I know for a fact that I am pretty entertaining, there’s no keynote. There’s no swag bag with a brands logo on it. Nobody is performing at you, attempting to upsell you on something. A great part of this day will be spent quiet, or listening to another woman talk, or with your hands in the herbs, toes in the grass not doing anything impressive.
If you need the day to be exciting, you will be bored around hour three + boredom out here on the land is actually part of the medicine, but only if you signed up for that.
This is not for the woman who’s coming to network.
Ten women on a farm is a beautiful room for connection + I fully expect some of you to leave with each other’s numbers. But if you are coming in scanning for who can do something for you, you will miss the whole thing. Worse, the other women sharing the space will feel it. We always feel it.
This is not for the women looking to get fixed in one Sunday.
This one is one of the most important things. I am not here to balance your hormones in seven hours. I am not going to hand you a protocol that resolves ten years of exhaustion all before dinner. Anyone promising you that is selling you something + it isnt medicine.
What you will leave with is a real foundation, language for the things you’ve been living without words for + a genuinely different relationship with your own body. That’s not a small thing. It’s a beginning, a good start.
This is not clinical care. If you’re in a health crisis right now, or in the thick of something that needs a provider, please seek that out 1st. Ill still be here after.
Truth moment? I’d rather have six right women on the land than ten polite ones.
Six women who actually want to be there will make a room that changes people. Ten women where four are checking their phones + waiting for it to be over will make a nice day that nobody remembers. I’ve personally been in both types of rooms. The second one is not an option here.
So here’s who it is for. Clearly.
The woman who is somewhere real in her lifecycle. Trying to understand her cycle for the first time at thirty-six. Deep in postpartum still wondering where she went. Forty-something + her body started doing things nobody warned her about. Any of those. All of those.
The woman who is tired of being handed pieces. A pamphlet here. A prescription there. Fifteen minutes with somebody who didnt look up from the screen. If you’ve had the feeling that somebody, somewhere, should have given you the whole picture by now, that feeling is correct + this is that room.
The woman who’s willing to be in her body for a day. Not perform in it. Not fix it. Just be in it, on some grass, with your hands in something, without apologizing for how it looks or what it’s been through.
The woman who can be around other women without armor. This one matters most. There’s a gathering to start + a gathering at the end. Nobody’s forced to say anything. But if you show up determined to keep everybody at arm’s length, ten seats means there’s nowhere to hide, + that’ll be uncomefortable for you.
Now let me tell you what the day actually asks of you, so nobody’s surprised.
It asks for whole Sunday. Not part of one. It asks for a commute for those that are not local, or even a Saturday night nearby if that is easier. It asks for your phone to mostly stay in your bag + it asks you to been seen by nine other women, which for a lot of us is the hardest thing on the list.
That’s the cost. Not just the money.
If you read all of that + something in you got quiet + said yes, that, then I already know who you are. You’ve been waiting for somebody to describe the thing that you needed instead of selling you the thing they had.
If you read this + felt relief that this isnt for you, thats a good outcome too. Thats the information about what you actually need. Go get that instead.
Either way I’m glad you read to the bottom
XO
Denawa Deniece
